The Power of 'NO'
As a child, 'no' is one of the worst things you can hear. You want your way. It's not much different as adults. We live in a world of instant gratification. So not getting what we want when we want it is like hearing 'no' and we take it as a form of rejection. It's someone or something telling you, you can't have your way. How frustrating, right?! Yes, it can be. But let me tell you, hearing no can be a beautiful thing. It can mean a closed door you wanted to walk through but really, that door wasn't supposed to open.
I think the lesson of hearing 'no' is especially important when it comes to your career.
- It's humbling. Being turned down by an opportunity puts things into perspective. Maybe it means you really weren't qualified for that role and it's time to shift your own expectations. Revisit that resume, seek advice from your mentors you know you best and get yourself back out there, chasing the right opportunities that suit you.
- It's motivating. You know what you're worth and hearing no can give you the push you need to chase what you want AND deserve even harder. After all, it's pretty damn satisfying doing what people say you cannot do!
- It's better than than 'yes'. Hearing 'no' can be better than hearing 'yes' if the 'yes' meant settling for the wrong opportunity. Ask yourself, "Is that really even what I wanted?" Maybe you'll be surprised by your answer and end up thankful someone told you 'no'. I know I am :)
So don't fear 'no'. Rather, embrace it. You'll learn A LOT about yourself if you choose to accept & understand the 'no's' in your life as a test of your patience & persistence.
You're suppose to be a 'YES' person, right? 'Yes' means you have a positive attitude with the best intentions. And especially for women, saying 'no' to your friends is a bitchy thing to do. But if you can't follow through with your good intentions, your yes is compromised. So it's better to tell people 'no' than 'yes' and flake out later.
Being able to say no is the sign of a self-aware, confident person that knows their strengths as well as limitations. These types of people don't over commit & leave people with empty promises. Fostering the ability to say 'no' will help preserve your relationships and make you a more reliable friend and co-worker. Start with something small. Saying 'no' will eventually become easier and easier and will allow you to fill up your life with meaning and cut out the excess.
Want to be someone people can count on? Be a woman (or man) of your word.